āDepression stole my life in every way imaginable,ā said Leenza Thompson, a student at Queenās University in Kingston, Ont. ā[I felt] completely empty at some points, like I was just a shell of a human. . . . I really felt like I was a waste of space on earth. I felt that no one could ever love me.ā
Then Thompson joined a discipleship huddle through Resonate Global Mission partner Geneva House campus ministry. There she began to discover her identity as loved by God and was able to take her first steps toward healing.
Thompson was raised in a Christian home but became close friends with an atheist during high school and started examining the Bible. Did God really create the universe? Did Jesus really walk on water, heal the sick, and raise the dead? āI decided thereās no way God could exist,ā said Thompson. āThereās no way any of this is possible.ā
At the university, Thompson began questioning her worldview again. She struggled with unbearable depression, contemplating suicide and using a razor for self-harm. She searched for a way to break depressionās grip on her life.
At that point she noticed that Geneva House was hosting a seekersā discipleship huddle for students to explore Christianity and ask tough questions.
āI didnāt want to go,ā said Thompson. āBut as I found myself at this rock-bottom place . . . I thought maybe they have something to offer me that I couldnāt find in my life.ā
In the huddle, Thompson read through the Gospel of John. As weeks went by, she felt cared for by Geneva House leaders Julia Kooy and Kathy Doering, who prayed for her before every meeting and encouraged her to apply Scripture to her own life.
In the midst of depression, Thompson heard God speaking to her. āOne night in my room, I felt like God was saying, āGet out your Bible.ā It was late at night and I didnāt want to get out of my bed, but God just kept saying, āGet out your Bible. Get out your Bible.āā
Thompson listened to God and read her Bible. āThe main message was that God loves me no matter what. It was really transforming. . . . Godās real.ā
Thompson accepted Christ that night.
āIt was visibly evident when we saw her at our next huddle,ā said Kooy. āShe looked different. There was this joy about her, this peace that we hadnāt seen.ā
God told Thompson to throw out the razor blade she had been using to harm herself, and she hasnāt thought about self-harming since. Over the next few months, Thompson began to heal from depressionāand God has transformed her life.
She joined other huddles, moved into a missional house on campus, and switched her major to religious studies. She hopes to one day earn a Master of Divinity with a concentration on Christian counseling.
About the Author
Cassie Westrate, Resonate Global Mission